I’d like to just come right out and say it: I’ve never watched a single episode of Speed Racer, so I don’t know how faithful this adaptation is. That said, something tells me the Wachowski Bros. are going a little overboard here. This looks like it’s going to be another Batman and Robin, or maybe two hours’ worth of the virtual reality sequences in Spy Kids 3.

Don’t get me wrong—it looks like it’ll be fun. I just think films like this (that try to make the real world look cartoony) and films like Beowulf (that try and make cartoons look ultra-realistic) ultimately aren’t able to hold the viewer’s suspension of disbelief. At least, not long enough to deliver an engaging story. If it’s just about being a popcorn flick, then fine… but these days it’s getting harder and harder to justify paying movie theater prices. As of right now, Speed Racer is on my “rent on DVD” list. We’ll see how things progress as the film develops. (A pun! Get it?)

But hey, don’t take my word for it! You can see the teaser trailer for yourself at Yahoo! Movies.

On a mostly unrelated note, LOST fans will he happy to know that even this trailer has a “Jackface” contribution (Matthew Fox is playing Racer X):

For those of you who don’t know what this is about, you were apparently doing your homework or something equally unimportant when the rest of us were watching “Perchance to Dream.” That, of course, is the now-infamous episode of Batman: The Animated Series where the Caped Crusader gets stuck in a Mad Hatter-induced dream world. Ol’ Brucey didn’t realize he was dreaming, however, until a crucial point where he attempted to read a newspaper (9:35 in this clip)—and the text was jumbled beyond all recognition. In the climax of the episode, Bruce gives us this encapsulated science lesson:

“That’s because reading is the function of the right-side of the brain, while dreams come from the left-side. It’s impossible to read something in a dream.”

One of the things that sets Batman apart from a bunch of other superheroes is that he’s supposed to be a detective (one of his “official” nicknames is “World’s Greatest Detective”), so when Mr. Wayne dishes out a nugget like this, his fans assume they’re being taught something that’s… well… true. The show left us young viewers under the impression that you really couldn’t read text when you were dreaming. Which meant that when I later had dreams where I could read, I took it to mean that I was special or had some sort of above-average right/left brain connection.

And now, finally, after years of bewilderment and self-doubt, my gullibility has been immortalized in a webcomic.