We’ve now started our 3rd year in Sarasota. While I’d love to say it hasn’t changed me, it’s currently 71ºF in the house and I’m shivering, wondering if I should adjust the thermostat to get the heater going.

This is a bad sign, but things could get much, much worse. If you happen to spot me driving around in a convertible, wearing something obnoxious and gold around my neck? Please just put me out of my misery right then and there.

Penelope (“Penny”) Joy Seitler
born June 17th, 2009 at 1:09pm
weighing 9 lbs, 4 oz and measuring 20 inches long

More to come later, but for now? We rest.

Apparently the years of inane, almost-funny strips… it was all an act! In the course of a single 1-panel comic, Keane has pwned all the haters. He has shown just how dark and twisted he can really be.

I mean, having the star of the strip carrying around a dead pet, implying through his question that maybe… just maybe… his sweet kitten isn’t dead after all? Ooh! Bravo, Mr. Keane. You have successfully shown us all that you can play demented with the best of ‘em, while at the same time making us feel guilty for ever wanting to see it in the first place.

Could it be that we’re on the cusp of seeing Family Circus walk down paths blazed by Lynn Johnston’s For Better or For Worse Gouge Your Eyes Out and Tom Batiuk’s Funky Winkerbean (Remembers Dead Loved Ones Over A Pint Filled With His Own Tears)?

Please, good sir, bring back the schlock tomorrow! I don’t think our hearts could take little Billy’s reaction when he realizes that “DED KITTEH… IZ DED.”

(At least, I could wish this was the intended meaning behind the strip. Nicole thinks it’s something more… inane. One can hope, though…)

This is another of rediscovered writings from 1999. I actually read this over the air during one of WJTL’s Youth Group Nights. “Radio Friend” Phil Smith let me read it on-air without looking over it first… and he seemed a bit unnerved when I was through.

A chilling darkness fills the sky,
a cold and sinister screen.
Grotesque, demonic shapes fly ’round
with eyes of glowing green.

You feel them breathing down your neck,
but frozen there, you lie.
While blazing, white hot lightning
all around you fills the sky.

Slowly you perceive their forms
with bloodlust in their eyes,
And at that very moment you
know they have found their prize.

They laugh at, mock and taunt you.
They take pleasure from your pain.
And even though you try to flee,
your struggle is in vain.

But then you find your Holy weapon,
just before they pounce;
A sword of shining silver with
which they will be renounced.

You strike ten, nay, a hundred beasts,
with thousands left to slay.
The nearest standing makes it clear
he’ll not be chased away.

“I’ve known you your entire life,
I’ve made you what you are.
Although, I am surprised that you
have gotten quite this far.”

The words that pass ‘tween slimy lips,
they fill your heart with dread:
“The game is over now my child,
in other words, you’re dead.”

The battle rages quite some time,
good swordsmanship you show.
But then he brings you to your knees
with a near-fatal blow.

“I said that you would never win,
and very soon, you’ll die.
For you have passed up every chance
to join the Prince of Lies.”

With every bit of energy
still flowing in your blood,
You raise the sword above your head
and stick it in the mud.

You close your eyes and bow your head,
you pray to God on high,
To send His mighty warriors,
swords lighting up the nigh.

The clouds recede into the sky,
a beam of light streaks down.
Ten thousand Holy warriors step
onto the battleground.

You suddenly wake up with a start
and scan your dim-lit room.
You sense an evil presence,
makes the dark feel like a tomb.

You’re out of bed and on your knees,
you pray with all your might,
That from this day until the last
you’ll carry on the fight.

And as you climb back into bed
this thought you start to feel:
“Was this all just in my head,
or was that battle real?”

• I’m stepping down as Art Director for Gemstone Publishing’s line of Disney Comics. My last day will be Wednesday, November 26th.
• Two days later, we’re loading up a truck and moving to Columbus, Ohio! (Thanks in advance to Rae Whitlock, who’s already agreed to round up some strapping young church men to help us unload the truck over the weekend.)
• I’m looking to take on some additional freelance web design and optimization clients. If you know anybody who’s looking for that, you can get yourself a 10% referral bonus (because I’m cool like that—also because I hate cold-calling). Just go on over to the “Feedback” page and pick your favorite way to get in touch with me.

UPDATE: According to Google Maps, this might be where we’re moving:

We intend to largely keep it under wraps until launch, but we’ll nevertheless try and keep you updated on our progress. For now, you’ll have to content yourselves with this conceptual art. (It’s been magnified 4x so you can better appreciate the many details already in place.)

We don’t have a launch date finalized, but marks your calendars for a June ’09 release!

My favorites, though, were all the “when flashing” signs we drove past. Nicole wasn’t, so I was pretty confident that we could just dismiss them all.

"The hallmark of an authentic evangelicalism is not the uncritical repetition of old traditions, but the willingness to submit every tradition, however ancient, to fresh Biblical scrutiny and, if necessary, reform" (John Stott, "Basic Stott," Christianity Today, Jan.8, 1996)

This quote was cited in The Problem With Preaching, a year-old article I just discovered. The author says this:

"Preaching" as it is practiced in churches today (& in the past) has little biblical basis—the "preaching" that occurs is extra-biblical (outside the bible). In the New Testament, preaching was always linked to preaching of the gospel or kingdom to those that are outside or on the edge of the kingdom—the Greek verbs used in the NT to portray preaching are found overwhelmingly in situations which are outside church meetings and evangelistic in nature. In contrast, in our churches today we "preach to the choir"—most people sitting in churches listening to sermons are Christians, and most have been there listening to sermons for many years—our preaching is actually teaching about Christianity to a predominantly Christian audience, week after week for the rest of their lives.

He lays out a pretty strong case for his stance, and I’d recommend y’all read this article—if for nothing else than to get a fresh perspective on something we typically take for granted in the Church.

I walked inside the room and o'er
Into the kitchen, I did haste
To open up the fridge's door
For I had hoped that I could taste

Some ham and cheese between wheat bread
Or, perhaps, a salad tossed
But oh, my heart was filled with dread
When fast, the odor wafted 'cross

My nose. And what a smell it was
Which now began to fill the air
For covered deep, the food in skuzz
And so I said a little prayer.

Then out came moldy peaches, green
And also splotchy chowder soup
I tossed the curdled coffee cream
And 'tater salad, turned to goop.

Digging deeper I soon found
Some bleu cheese, and I'm sure I knew
That way back when I bought that pound
The cheese was certainly not blue!

I can't believe that I picked up
Four gallons of whole milk one night
But now my cat had chunky sup…
He'll never know the difference, right?

Out went raisins; out went beans
(Where'd the grapes and sprouts get to?)
I went crazy as I cleaned
The squishy squash from off my shoe

Then pickles, eggs, and pickled eggs
Soon followed their o'er-ripened friends
And all the other nasty dregs
Until my cleaning reached the end.

I carried out two bulging sacks
And dropped them off along the curb
I hoped the dump would take them back
And not charge extra for my nerve.

Going on inside I got
A half and one whole piece of bread
That were not touched by blue-green spots
And so, a thought ran through my head.

I grabbed the only meat remained
Canned cat food'yes, acquired taste
But kitty's got milk consomm'
And nothing more will go to waste.

No, I take that back. I haven’t made a single sale yet.

I’ve opened a CafePress shop and I’ll be starting to stock it with odd things I put together in my spare time. Feel free to look at it as a way of starting the Seitlers’ “our car won’t last forever” fund.

Right now them pickin’s is pretty slim: there’s a shirt likely to appeal only to my immediate family, and then there’s a snarky shirt with a quote from Lincoln about the role of the Judiciary Branch of the United States Federal Government. Maybe I’ll get a “Second MousePad” in there or sumpthin’.

There’s just something about how fresh-from-a-nap Baby Girl…she’s so snuggly and sweet. =)

So how are you spending your Saturday?

We had a wonderful time! There was a slide show running in the background during communion, and with each successive slide showing another scene in the Gethsemane-to-Golgotha story, Katie would point to the projection screen and whisper, “Jesus?”

She was a little confused, though: there was a picture of Jesus on the cross, being raised into the vertical position, but Katie must’ve thought there was a strong wind or something… when she saw that slide she asked, “Jesus fall down?”

Another funny moment was after I told her one of the slides was of “a lamb; a baby sheep.” Next time around, she looks at me and (as loud as she can) goes, “MOOOO.”

Yeah. We’re still working on our animal sounds.