On The Other Hand

17 Sep, 2007

Abuse? (You’re kidding, right?)

Posted by: Travis In: Theological Musings

From You Can’t Love Jesus and Hate His Wife (Catalyst):

But then, he starts verbally ripping on my wife like she’s not even standing there. She’s right there! He thinks my wife, who has been the love of my life and a partner in ministry for 25 years, is a drain on my ability to influence others. He says she’s obsolete and that the “old girl is a little faded.”

I’m in shock.

Suddenly, the cheesy Christian motto of the 1990s flashes through my mind: What would Jesus do? Turn the other cheek? Pray for His enemy? Hand this guy His cloak?

I’m about to go Jack Bauer on him.

…but Stetzer wouldn’t “go Jack Bauer on” his own wife if she were the one doing the ripping, right?
…so he’s not angry about Christians ripping on the Church, right?
…because it’s not just pastors who make up the Bride, right?

Nope. According to Stetzer, verbal criticism of what’s being done wrong in the Church is “abus[ing Jesus'] wife.” As in, “abusing another person.” As in, “this [organization that I and others administer] is his wife, and you’re other.”

Sounds like just another repackaging of the ol’ knee-slapper, “touch not the LORD’s anointed!” Because this article isn’t about Christians en masse (the Biblical definition of “the Bride of Christ”) being criticized; it’s about criticizing structures and organizations–or more to the point, the pastors behind them.

See, in many pastors’ minds, they are the church. You just attend and give them money (and occasionally trouble).

Alarmingly there is a significant group of men and women leaving the church but holding to a form of Christian devotion. Wrong answer!

We’re not leaving the Church, Mr. Stetzer. We’re leaving the artificial power structure that men like you have dedicated your lives to propping up. We’re leaving the State-sponsored clubs that you and other “pastors” insist we join. We’re leaving modern Pharisaism. But we’re not leaving the Church.

If anything, the Church abandons us because few Christians care about “fellowship” outside of structured meetings (and this includes small groups). We stop showing up at the clubhouse on Sunday morning, and strangely we stop getting invited to people’s houses, too (if we were ever invited in the first place). We stop attending a “Care Group” and all of a sudden the other people there get the impression that they aren’t under any obligation to care for us anymore.

And why is that? Because what you call “the church” isn’t the Bride of Christ–not in any meaningful sense. No, what you call “the church” is just a man-made system that the forces of Hades certainly could stand against–if they had any such inclination.

3 Responses to "Abuse? (You’re kidding, right?)"

1 | mo

September 19th, 2007 at 5:13 pm

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I dunno Travis, I agree with much of what you write, but here I think Mr. Stetzer has a point, some people take criticizing the church way too far.

Plus, I don’t know if you’ve read any of his other stuff, but Ed Stetzer is pretty far from propping up an artificial power structure. In fact, much of what he has written lately is a plea for a new type of church to emerge, and I always have appreciated how he does it without trashing current structrues.

2 | Travis

September 19th, 2007 at 5:52 pm

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Okay, but what do you mean when you say, “criticizing the church“? What is “the church” to you, and are you using it here in a way that fits what you say it means?

See, I kind of grew up around this sort of macho bravado that gets personally offended (in his words, “all Jack Bauer”) when a prized someone or possession is dissed–but fails to take into account the relationship between the disser and the dissed.

When the two are one and the same, shouldn’t the response be different? Or is it reasonable to beat up your wife when she criticizes herself?

3 | mo

September 19th, 2007 at 11:27 pm

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Alright, I finally read the article, and here’s a few thoughts:

I understand “the Church” as being the Church universal, and as I read the article I see the same thing. I see Stetzer drawing a distinction between criticizing “the Church” and “a Church”, in fact, toward the end of his article he is quite critical of Churches, without insulting “the Church”

Second, I’m probably the wrong guy to ask the wife question to, because I have been known on occasion when my wife is being overly critical of herself to look her in the eye and say “don’t talk about my wife that way”. There is a line between being critical in a contructive way, and being critical in a destructive way, and I feel when anyone crosses that line it’s best to stop the destrucive behavior before addressing the matter at hand.

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